在instagram上发现了他的电话号码 尝试着发了条信息 那人说他不是 后来又说是 我一直在想办法让他说出他手机型号 我也不知道这人是不是他 估计不是吧
真的不喜欢她这一点
airi当时就不停地闹 一直在说 “susanna喜欢———” 各种尴尬有没有 叫她闭嘴他就喊得更大声了 不理她吧她就以为没事就把名字小声说出来
每个人都有这么一个朋友吧 像爱情专家似的 我觉得我自己就是一个 她也是
然后我就走了 跟julia去rc逛街 她说“其实你心里还是有他的 不管多少 5%也好 尽管你一直说你不喜欢他了” 她说对了 比5%多 有20%吧 她说 我应该表白 我真心想 就是迈不出这一步
看他涂防晒的时候动作超妩媚！！娘死了！！各种想扑倒
各种偷拍 背影已经不能满足我了 各种求正面侧面
我就这么一个event 当时跑完了就可以走的 但是没走 留下来想跟他多呆一会 我真的做不到完全不喜欢他
然后就今天 may9 2014 这傻逼1200m 没来跑 我当时跑的都快要死了 前四百米慢跑 后八百米跑跑走走的 丢死人了好嘛
showchoir时 我们玩一个游戏 背对着黑板然后猜黑板上的字 我就玩了一次 不过一次就猜中了 当时一直偷看他 各种认为他好看
这个傻逼全身的世界大牌啊 袜子都是tommy hilfiger的 这么土豪钱包却扁扁的
嗯 然后就是may 8 2014了 我们准备母亲节礼物 他让我们都惊讶了 一个男的手工做的比我还好还不娘！
坐他旁边 各种扭头假装找人借口看他一眼
不小心看到他手机密码 真心复杂 这么复杂是要装逼吗！一直以为他手机是苹果 实际上不是
At night we had gateway theatre performance. We were first. Then i was sitting six seats beside him. 一开始和他隔了六个座位，然后慢慢的移到五个座位。各种找借口离他近点儿。最后和他就隔了一个。不想再近了。
May 7 2014 we were at mcroberts for the grade seven day. I really missed that guy.
今天上体育课 他打羽毛球 真的好帅！
谁让他以前笑我满脸痘的2223333333
突然发现！！这个逗比开始长痘了233333333333333
今天看他穿了一件新的格子衫 好老气
原以为真的看见他就像看见瓷器和小狗一样 心里还是有一点感觉的 会淡的吧
可是没办法阿 曾今能包容不代表往后能一直包容下去
假装自己要给他发一条信息 关于我的感情 写到越后面发现真的 他有好多的缺点 爱嘲笑别人 幼稚 孩子气
昨晚半夜睡不着想了很多事 发现自己真的没那么喜欢他了 毕竟感情随着时间会慢慢淡的
发现心里还是有悸动的 谁都能骗就是骗不了自己
Miss him
But then now i just
I sent an email to airi about that i don't think i still like him anymore in fact i was because at lunch he was so loud and i got so annoyed
Then i was about to leave and packing up i didn't rly want to leave so i just walked around the room and pretend to find something. Tried to look at his project and pretending I'm not doing that on purpose
I was trying to see if he actually is paying attention to her so i kinda turned towards him and found out he looked at me immediately
Apr 15 2014 yesterday i stayed after school to finish the expo and surprisingly, kevin stayed too and viola Catherine was there. After they left its like so awkward We both are not taking
I told her not to say that in front of people and she was like okok but she still says it
I got real mad at yuri :( she's so bad at gossiping can't she be any quieter?
Mother fucker!! At lunch yuri and airi started making jokes about me and kevin they were yelling susanna aime manger des bananas with kevina' that was really embarrassing and people were staring at me. I bet kevin heard it and now he fucking knows that i fucking like him and i fucking want to die but before dying let me kill yuri??!!
昨天小息后去课室的时候看到他淡淡的笑着 卧蚕超级明显 顿时感觉到他是一个多么好看的逗比！！
我今天有一点儿不爱你了，明天又爱你少了点. I wish i can be like that. I left for so long i couldn't even remember kevins smile. Yuri said he is not hot and i agreed. For the first impression he is those kind of people who always ruins the class but after you get to know him, he is really nice and a good friend. Then some day we had tract attack, and he changed in the classroom. I was really staring at his back. I started thinking that he actually is a bishie. So like that my feelings increased. It always increased till yesterday, yuri asked me if i still like him. I lied, i told her its only 2/10 now. Here, at this website is where I can say what i really want to say and what i can't say. Reading through all my notes here and i can see that i still like him, a lot.
Apr 11 2014 how's my feeling for kevin now? Um...i used to like him so much, so much that i couldn't keep it anymore so i told Rebecca. Then it decreased a little bit and increased a lot. Sometimes i really want to stop liking him but i just can't. Then i told julia. After telling julia i felt really nice, because I can talk about him whenever i want. Unlike with Rebecca, i had to act like i am really calm and really wuiet but i am not. I am those people who can laugh till they cry. Julia brought me to yuri and airi but i didn't tell them until they were rly curious. With them i feel really free, with Rebecca i feel rly heavy and fake. With Rebecca its like, i always says something stupid and Rebecca just go like lol. She thinks i am stupid but she acts like she doesn't think i am. After hanging with yuri and airi, feelings for kevin just decreased a little bit and increased a little bit. Then i went to china for vaca. Then day i left i rly missed him, like missing him so hard i wanted to run back to school. Thinking of his smile can melt my heart ><. During the vaca i didn't even think a lot about him. When I came back i started worrying if i look the same as i left. Was i fatter or more pimples? At school i found out no one really cares about you. I was about to stop liking him. I still can't. Likes for so many years can't just go away so suddenly
Then we were reading little Nicolas, and kevin had to choose a girl to read. He hesitated and chose viola. I don't know why he chose her. Viola and him are not friends. I could feel my friends looking at me to see my expression and i wasn't really jelly.
Apr 9 2014 最近有运动会 锻炼之前要换衣服 卧槽煞笔他直接在课室里换阿！直接把最外面的卫衣拉掉 里面的T恤也跟着掉了 我当时在他背后 看见一条超漂亮的背线阿有木有！貌似还露出一点内裤。。夏威夷海滩泳裤的赶脚。。。当时看了真的有想喷鼻血的冲动！！
真的好希望能拥有都敏俊的超能力 穿越 这样想回来就可以回来了 哪怕是几分钟也行啊
明天最后一天 不要宅在家里要出去走 这么宝贵的时间怎么可以宅在家里呢
后天就要回去了 想想就想哭
人越大越容易伤感 好想小的时候无忧无虑
想哭又不能痛痛快快地哭 只能默默地流眼泪
qq上发了一句不想回去 徐慧回复我说 相聚之后总会有相离 相离莫相忘 看着这句眼泪突然流下来
今天和亲戚们一起去吃饭 突然好舍不得 后悔没有珍惜这些时光
徐慧是一个非常好的朋友 是我第一个意义上能和我无话不谈的好朋友
我问她 我应不应该去找王璐 是她鼓励我去的
终于找到了徐慧 跟我一直聊到半夜 当时真的很想哭